Get Out...Get Going!
The possessive kind of people; may be a girl or a boy, are not only interested about their respective love-interests but they are too engrossed in the other person’s life. May it be personal, professional, social, psychological or even geographical for that matter; they want total control of the other person. In the process they forget what is called ‘The Space’ of the person. Let’s elaborate on this aspect:
Checking out the incoming and outgoing calls, SMSs, emails, postal mails, etc. of the person; may or may not be to the best of their knowledge. I have met a girl who had gone up to the extent that she would give a call to an incoming/outgoing number if the name of the person was unknown or not displayed in her boyfriend’s list. The reason for this over-possessiveness is one and only; INSECURITY. What if he/she falls in love with someone else? What if he/she betrays me? What if he/she two-times with me? Where would I go? To whom will I turn for help? I’ll be all alone. And what will the world say that I was incapable of holding on to my love! Then all of a sudden the gush of fright, chills and a sense that the world will surely be over.
To tell you honestly, I feel the basis of any love-story is TRUST. Trust in yourself, trust in your love. I don’t say that you let go everything that he/she does. But you yourself analyze the depth of every unnecessary behavior that you have adamantly accepted as a necessary aspect. Whenever you are together make him/her as comfortable as you would make any of your friends comfortable. If he likes to talk about movies ask him the latest reviews if he has any. If she love to gossip about her friends, be cozy and let her speak out every single word she wants to. Never let him distract or get bored by your presence. If he has a call and wants to attend it aloofly then let him do so. If not informed, do not keep on pestering with “whose call was it”? To be precise, be super cool about the relationship. It sounds super-cool to do; nevertheless it is super-difficult to carry out. All this requires a lot of patience before it is converted into a habit. If you are kind to the person, even if he/she decides to stir away from you, it won’t happen. I have seen this work. And in spite of your kind and beautiful behavior this drift happens, always remember the line “IT WAS NEVER YOURS”. Never does it make any sense to keep on hanging on to a lose branch if it is going to break eventually.
Just because you fear to go through a lonely phase of life, doesn’t mean you make your present life a big drag. I have seen boys writing blood-stained letters, girls deciding to bob their beautiful heads to their ceiling fan, girls sobbing every single drop till they need to be admitted to the nearest hospital, depression, anxiety, nervous-breakdown, trauma and finally what is left is a long trace of unwanted memories and even worst; a totally wrecked life.
You know the most standard way for anybody to start crying is like this. First the chin starts shaking, the nostrils start expanding, and the lower lip is in total synchronization with the chin, the cheeks turn a bit red, the eyes start moving and then a small drop brings the final message out. Now that’s what I call a decent way to cry. You may be a girl or a boy who possibly has a small drop of tear in their eye by now.
Don’t do this to yourself people…seriously! No one in this entire world is worth those precious emotions. Think of your parents for whom you have been the only reason to live. Except for your closest family NO ONE in this world is worth so much involvement. The harshest truth of life is that friends are never permanent. Best Friends are none. All we have are Good Friends with whom you can have fun and share some moments of happiness and grief. Family is the only group of people who would stay with you till you do not leave this world. Girlfriends & Boyfriends are a chance that you can take. If it works you are lucky. If it doesn’t then you are luckier because now you have a failed relationship in your kitty and lots of experience for a future successful venture. Come-on folks you get to live just once. Live it to the fullest, in your own possible way. Don’t get addicted to something because of this entire trauma. Alcohol, Cigarettes, drugs are the easiest way of not getting that beautiful person you have always wanted to be with. Give God some time to send you your gift. Else when you reach the gates of Heaven all you might know is that your gift was already dispatched to your old address.
Checking out the incoming and outgoing calls, SMSs, emails, postal mails, etc. of the person; may or may not be to the best of their knowledge. I have met a girl who had gone up to the extent that she would give a call to an incoming/outgoing number if the name of the person was unknown or not displayed in her boyfriend’s list. The reason for this over-possessiveness is one and only; INSECURITY. What if he/she falls in love with someone else? What if he/she betrays me? What if he/she two-times with me? Where would I go? To whom will I turn for help? I’ll be all alone. And what will the world say that I was incapable of holding on to my love! Then all of a sudden the gush of fright, chills and a sense that the world will surely be over.
To tell you honestly, I feel the basis of any love-story is TRUST. Trust in yourself, trust in your love. I don’t say that you let go everything that he/she does. But you yourself analyze the depth of every unnecessary behavior that you have adamantly accepted as a necessary aspect. Whenever you are together make him/her as comfortable as you would make any of your friends comfortable. If he likes to talk about movies ask him the latest reviews if he has any. If she love to gossip about her friends, be cozy and let her speak out every single word she wants to. Never let him distract or get bored by your presence. If he has a call and wants to attend it aloofly then let him do so. If not informed, do not keep on pestering with “whose call was it”? To be precise, be super cool about the relationship. It sounds super-cool to do; nevertheless it is super-difficult to carry out. All this requires a lot of patience before it is converted into a habit. If you are kind to the person, even if he/she decides to stir away from you, it won’t happen. I have seen this work. And in spite of your kind and beautiful behavior this drift happens, always remember the line “IT WAS NEVER YOURS”. Never does it make any sense to keep on hanging on to a lose branch if it is going to break eventually.
Just because you fear to go through a lonely phase of life, doesn’t mean you make your present life a big drag. I have seen boys writing blood-stained letters, girls deciding to bob their beautiful heads to their ceiling fan, girls sobbing every single drop till they need to be admitted to the nearest hospital, depression, anxiety, nervous-breakdown, trauma and finally what is left is a long trace of unwanted memories and even worst; a totally wrecked life.
You know the most standard way for anybody to start crying is like this. First the chin starts shaking, the nostrils start expanding, and the lower lip is in total synchronization with the chin, the cheeks turn a bit red, the eyes start moving and then a small drop brings the final message out. Now that’s what I call a decent way to cry. You may be a girl or a boy who possibly has a small drop of tear in their eye by now.
Don’t do this to yourself people…seriously! No one in this entire world is worth those precious emotions. Think of your parents for whom you have been the only reason to live. Except for your closest family NO ONE in this world is worth so much involvement. The harshest truth of life is that friends are never permanent. Best Friends are none. All we have are Good Friends with whom you can have fun and share some moments of happiness and grief. Family is the only group of people who would stay with you till you do not leave this world. Girlfriends & Boyfriends are a chance that you can take. If it works you are lucky. If it doesn’t then you are luckier because now you have a failed relationship in your kitty and lots of experience for a future successful venture. Come-on folks you get to live just once. Live it to the fullest, in your own possible way. Don’t get addicted to something because of this entire trauma. Alcohol, Cigarettes, drugs are the easiest way of not getting that beautiful person you have always wanted to be with. Give God some time to send you your gift. Else when you reach the gates of Heaven all you might know is that your gift was already dispatched to your old address.
posted by Zephyr at 8:43 AM
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